to live as i have lived
is absurd
in apartments and rental houses year by
year, country by country,
one teaching job after
another, teaching information,
teaching skills,
never teaching the truth

one child after another, 
strange names, loving faces, 
wild minds

one technical book after another, diagramming
cognitive love infinity, one self-tuning poem fiction
after another, unpublished unwanted not unloved 

one night of love after another,
one frantic fight after another
one reaction after another,
one spastic zip through foreign lands, exotic,
comprehended dimly,
one book absorbed
one science
one minute
one second
one hour
to live as i have lived
is absurd
the outer form moving
the inner form sliding
evolving by its own logic
or otherwise
entirely one you and me madness dividing
after another
one lust parade swallowing
after another
one fantasy one crazed core dream
after another
on and on for years

The face turned inwards must wail
whirl around
sink knowledge
The person generating wanders
in the demon of the interior
must strike a note upon the bells
of demanding whatever
The creative multicolored feathered eyes
of abandon
crystal whirlwind mind of firefeet
thirst step from its care
its love for everyone 
out must it step from its cave
and look up at the sun

It's so easy to forget these things!
It's all so terribly clear
so clear right now
I'm 9 times more lucid
than ever
looking up at the smile
of the sun
in the light of my whirlwind
Quetzalcoatl,
sun lizard
you feel so old
so true

I've been here before and will be here
again i know
One true new beginning
won after another
One random resolution
won after another
To be kinder warmer more wise
less upset less crazed-head
delirious more as envisioned
in the crystal eye
inside

One good thing about the sun god:
it's always there up in the sky
Every time you look up
you remember
inside its power glow
the eye




Grab your partner! -- do si do -- around again! -- around you go! --

One wild rotation after another, one in/out motion after another, one 
burnt explosion love, one quantum experience or fact --

Absurdity wraps its arms around me
like a virulent succubus -- Or is there health
inside this madness?

One moment alive
after another --
Take my hand friend
take the light of my 
directness
let us dive us through our
selves again